You will have no doubt come across some variant of this quote from Alexander Graham Bell:
When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.– Alexander Graham Bell
In the previous article we described how we are the master of the opportunities that we will face tomorrow based on the actions that we perform today.
Based on a discussion that we had here at @happyops we would like to extend the metaphor provided by Alexander Graham Bell. All too often we will be attached to the situation and opportunities that were previously available at the door behind us, this might be for work, relationships, or some other door that has been open to us. It might be tempting to keep previous opportunities available to us, to keep them on the table so that we might be able to return and pick them back up in the future. Sometimes the opportunity is some option, some plan ‘b’ that we have kept at the back of our mind as a get-out clause if the current situation at work or relationship falls through.
The plan ‘b’ is a little safety net that we are mentally prepared to fall back to. Immediately this means that we are holding back, not really committing to the to job or to the relationship, and we are holding back just in case we need that when we return to the previous job or relationship.
Of course, this does not mean that we should do our due diligence before committing to a new job or relationship. Even once we start a new job or relationship we might soon realise that we have made a dreadful mistake. But having the made up our minds and mentally committed to the decision, we should be in the new job or relationship wholeheartedly. This does not mean vowing undying love forever (forever-ever?) but committing our time and resources and keeping the new job or relationship in the forefront of our minds.
The “what-ifs” are rarely realistic, making them little more than daydreams that waste your time.